Posted By: Nichol Chukwuemeka
A report on happiness starts off with a quick look
at the various definitions. Previous studies cited by The Happiness Show
website traced the concept of happiness to
the classical Greek word “Eudaimonia.” Etymologically, it consists of
the words
“eu” meaning good or well being, and “daimōn”
referring to spirit or minor deity. This reference to spirit is
extended to
mean one's lot or fortune.
The same source sites a modern definition that refers to happiness “as a positive, enduring state that consists of positive
feelings...and includes both peace of mind and active pleasures or joy."
Ruut Veenhoven,
acknowledged as an expert on international happiness, described
happiness as “the degree to which an individual
judges the overall quality of his life-as-a
whole favorably.” Related to this is one definition of the Oxford
Universal Dictionary
which suggests that “it is a feeling derived
from satisfaction with one's circumstances.” Wikipedia defines happiness
as “a
prolonged or lasting emotional or affective
state that feels good or pleasing.”
The scientific community
also tried to provide a biological explanation on the said concept. In
the human brain, the neurotransmitter
dopamine is reported to be involved in desire
and seems often related to pleasure.
The definition of happiness
varies for every person. Aristotle declared, “Happiness is the meaning
and the purpose of life,
the whole aim and end of human existence.”
Happiness is commonly viewed as a fundamental goal in life. In fact,
British people
have rated happiness as their most important
component of quality of Life. It is even more important to them than
money, health,
and sex!
Aren’t we curious to know how other people define happiness? For many, happiness is what they feel when they receive something
– a material gift or some sort of favor.
On the other hand, some
people find it better to give than to receive. They feel so much
happiness from giving and sharing
what they have. This selfless act can be the
most joyful experience for those people with generous hearts. “There is a
wonderful
mythical law of nature that the three things
we crave in life – happiness, freedom, and peace of mind – are always
attained
by giving them to someone else,” remarked by
Peyton Conway March.
Happiness is also what we
feel when we are satisfied with what we are doing or what we have
attained or accomplished. There
are people who derive happiness from their
success, wealth, or power. According to Albert Schweitzer, “Success is
not the
key to happiness. Happiness is the key to
success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”
What about the majority of people who are not lucky enough to achieve the dream they have long aspired for? Do they not have
the right to be happy?
Of course, they do!
Happiness starts with appreciating and finding satisfaction from simple
things that life has to offer.
The affection of a spouse, children, or
grandchildren, the company of friends and colleagues, and the
compliments paid to
us – these are some of the simple things that
capture the essence of true happiness.
“Happiness is what we feel
when we get what we want” – this is probably the most common notion
people have about happiness.
If this concept of happiness is correct, then
unhappiness is what we feel when we do not get what we want.
Consider the definition
above. The keyword in the definition is the word “want.” The problem
starts when we want something
and maintain an expanding list of wants. This
problem escalates when despite all efforts, only a small percentage of
our wishes
are fulfilled.
Unfulfilled wishes increase
with time. As we grow older and fail to get what we want, we get
frustrated and become unhappy.
Frustration sets in when we fail to fulfill
most of our desires. As we are exposed to TV, magazines, Internet, and
other media,
we compile a list of endless and unrealistic
demands. Because of this, life becomes an endless race to fulfill
desires.
According to Benjamin
Franklin, "There are two ways of being happy: We must either diminish
our wants or augment our means
-- either may do -- the result is the same
and it is for each man to decide for himself and to do that which
happens to be
easier."
To break out of this cycle, we must try to manage our needs and wants. Stephen Johnson differentiates wants and needs in his
book Yes Or No: Guide To Better Decisions. He said, “A want is a wish. A need is a necessity.”
We must learn to prioritize
our needs over wants. Needs are things that are necessary in life, such
as food, shelter, and
basic necessities. Common wants are
represented by latest models of cell phones, plasma TV, IPod, designer
jeans, luxury cars,
and the like. These are our desires, but we
can continue living without these in our lives. Stephen Johnson
differentiates
the two concepts in a simple way, “In life,
we may want a fancy house but need a loving home.”
We cannot be truly happy if
we keep on “wanting” or “desiring” more than what we have. Contentedness
is the gateway to happiness.
There is nothing wrong with having wants,
just as long as these things provide a positive motivating force. It is
okay as
long as we find happiness and fulfillment in
the process of going after our wants. Irrational wants can limit our
happiness
if we make these the focus of our lives;
hence, these only become sources of frustration.
Happiness is a personal
decision. We are in charge with our own lives. So if we truly want to be
happy, let us be guided by
this advice from Ken Keyes Jr., "We always
have enough to be happy if we are enjoying what we do have -- and not
worrying
about what we don't have."
Real happiness comes from within us and it starts by being satisfied with what we have. It does not matter if we have little
in terms of material possessions. It is finding contentment with things that we possess.
First key to happiness: Learn to appreciate simple things and manage desires.
